About Me--Kyomi O'Connor

Feb 03, 2021 by Kyomi O'Connor

Photo by Author, Santa Ysabel in California

Hello, and thank you for visiting my “About Me” page!


My name is Kyomi O’Connor. You may be thinking, What a unique name! Yes, it’s a combination of Japanese, me, and my late husband’s Irish last name. I am a memoir writer. My forthcoming memoir, Finding Home: A Japanese Immigrant Woman’s Life and Transformation, to be published in Fall 2022, is the story of my lifelong struggles and path to finding Self and wholeness in my life.


Please follow me and visit me at my website, http://kyomioconnor.com



I was my Japanese parents’ middle daughter. From the time I was little, I was conscious of and often traumatized by what was going on in and outside my world. I developed a strong sense of justice, freedom, and humanity. My childhood dream was to become a journalist and have an independent life. But a twist of fate led me to become a dentist and researcher.  


In 1990, I came to the States to work as a post-doctoral researcher at the present National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research at the National Institutes of Health in Bethesda, MD. I left my past in Japan and wouldn’t tell anyone in my new life about my former struggles.


Within one and a half months of my arrival, I met my destiny: Patrick, an English cancer researcher with Irish heritage. It was love at first sight, and he became my oasis, the primary source of my healing for a while. Gradually, my new American life was shaping me into a more practical, resilient person.


Patrick and I changed our careers and moved to San Diego for his job in February 1998. I built a pediatric dental practice in the indigenous American Indian community and maintained that practice for over fifteen years. During those years, Patrick and I practiced Buddhist teachings, grew together through our daily hardships, lived a wonderful life, and became partners and the “best-est” of friends.


                                          Photo by Author, Klamath Falls in Oregon

In the summer of 2013, Patrick suddenly fell ill. He was diagnosed with stage IV metastatic melanoma in the brain. After our super high-speed roller coaster ride and a fierce battle against his illness, Patrick passed away on
Independence Day in 2016.  


At his death bed, I had no sense of time or space. Nothing left; everything became rubble. In the months that followed, I lived a spiritless life, capable only of managing daily logistics and responsibilities.

One year after Patrick’s passing, I returned to my writing. It became my spiritual practice. At each excavation into the wreckage of my life, I cried and moaned aloud—but little by little, chisel mark by chisel mark, tear by tear, I became human again. Then truths began to come out. The writing I did as this happened was a work of pain, tears, and blood. Through these painful excavations, I came to accept what had happened, and what hadn’t happened, in my early life. Acceptance brought me to peace and to find my Self again, and returned light to my life.


That’s how my book was created.

      Now I live a great life full of light and
      happiness, engaged with all five of
      my senses, as well as my emotions
      and energy. I live with my two nine-
      year-old short-hair tabby cats,
      Tommy (boy), and Omi (girl).


      I love lots of things in my life—
      cooking, baking, photography,
      traveling (though not so much now
      during the pandemic), walking, yoga,
Photo by Author, La Jolla California                        Tai Chi, Chi Gong, arranging flowers,
                                                                                     listening to music, reading and
writing, Buddhist chanting, and meditation, etc. I am curious about anything having to do
with our human lives, art, culture, activism, politics... whatever is good and right for
humanity, hope, and love.


I love life and sharing goodness with fellow humans.


My Desires


I would like to share my story, life, hope, love, and light with everyone I can. Since my childhood, I have had this strong, unstoppable desire to help anyone with difficulties come out of the darkness and find their own way to the light. If my writing becomes an aid for anyone to find hope, comfort, and courage, that is what will make me happiest.



Examples of My Writings

Below I’ve listed some of my published (and soon-to-be-published!) writing.

Please visit me for more: http://MEDIUM.com@kyomioconnor


  • Forthcoming Memoir: Finding Home: A Japanese Immigrant Life and Transformation, will be published in Fall 2022.



Thank you very much again for visiting my page.

I hope to share more inspirational moments with you!